My family lives in another country and my husband's family lives near us, how do I handle the imbalance?

I met my husband here in CA and we've been married for 16 years. My problem is a combination of having a husband who is not strong and a set of controlling in-laws. I have nobody to turn to here as far as family is concerned. I talk to my parents on the phone regularly and my dad acts as a referee whenever my husband and I don't see eye to eye. My parents are in the Philippines. We don't see my in-laws that frequent but they are there for my husband to visit anytime. I also feel depressed these days 'cuz my parents are not getting any younger. I would like to move back to my original home in the Philippines. My husband is originally from there but he grew up in the US. It seems so lopsided to me. My inlaws are controlling over us. My husband has no back-bone. We are in a financial bid and he expects his parents to rescue him every time the mortgage is due. I did not realize this was his character. When I met him he held a very good position in a prestigious company, I did not have any inkling he would turn out this way. Very responsible and mature. How do I handle this situation I am in?